Reservoir of Resiliency

Happy Sunday, let’s rock & roll.

“The same tree that weathered an icy freeze earlier this year is the same tree fighting for hydration underneath the hot Texas sun.”

“So resilient, strong, and adaptable. Wish I could be like that.”

“The same woman that carried me in her belly for 9 months is the same woman that put up with my teenage rebellious phase.”

“So kind, unwavering, and patient. Wish I could be like that.”

“The same dog that was once sad, abused, and aggressive is now the same dog that is now happy and harmless.”

“So forgiving, accepting, and loving. Wish I could be like that.”

The examples above demonstrate levels of resilience and toughness that I have yet to fully master.

Resiliency is defined as the ability to withstand/recover from difficulties. Toughness, tenacity, adaptability, and “bouncebackability” are considered close synonyms.

Developing resiliency is a key tenet of the high-performance lifestyle — for good reason.

Anything that is considered “high performance” is just that. It takes a collection of skills and qualities to even sniff the deepest levels of living.

Anything high performance comes with tons of failures and setbacks. You knew that already.

Even at the pinnacle of success, many have fallen victim to the comfort of achievement, distractions of delusion, and losing the thread of toughness needed to combat the never-ending challenges of life.

When faced with intense difficulties, I find it useful to withdraw from my Reservoir of Resiliency.

I look for the times when I was scared, down bad, and depressed. Reflecting and knowing that I overcame those adversities gives me the strength needed to proceed in the present moment.

Life is tough — and the older I get, it seems as if it's only getting tougher.

That is why it is imperative that I continue to Refill my Reservoir of Resiliency.

Time to explore some corridors!

As for most qualities, there are multiple types of context we can dive into. In the context of resilience, there are 3 subcategories that really intrigue me.

Emotional, Mental, and Physical forms of resilience are the most handy in our journey of life.

Emotional Resilience looks like being aware and responding properly to your emotions as they arise throughout various life situations. Keeping your cool, maintaining perspective, and being aware of potential mistakes that could be made if you let emotions run your life.

Mental Resilience is the ability to withstand distractions and maintain focus in the most stressful situations. Also, on the flip side — being able to lock in and execute boring tasks repeatedly. Imagine the mental resilience needed for a pilot to ensure the aircraft is running smoothly — checking all the indicators etc. The pilot cannot be lacking — nor can any of us.

Physical Resilience is the ability to stress the body during training or rehab to build up muscle, tissues, and movement capacity. The ability to push your body to its limits consistently without suffering physical injury OR/AND the ability to push through pain/stress. Think of the marathon runner whose knee and hip are bothering him, but he is 5 miles into a 26.2-mile race. He needs to count on his physical toughness to complete his goal.

All 3 forms of resilience are needed in our journey to meaning — as a capable body, mind, and spirit are crucial to the success of the mission.

These 3 avenues tend to blend together — creating a Reservoir of Resiliency.

You can build resilience by embracing the reality of nature and life:

• Things change and rearrange all the time. Become an adaptable human that understands that life is often uncontrollable.

• Accept the uncontrollable things that happen, then make a game plan for dealing with them. I love stopping my negative thoughts and asking myself “Okay — what is my action plan?”

• Remaining calm and aware when emotions begin to rise. Labeling my emotions has been a game-changer for me. When someone cuts me off on the road, I tell myself I am feeling frustrated — labeling the emotion helps me understand it and thus enables me to work with the emotion instead of falling victim to the emotion.)

• Have an optimistic outlook on the failures you experience. I get it — failing sucks, but once the pain wears off, we are able to learn the lessons that the failure brought. Shake off the L’s champ, we got some work to do.

• Weak things break. When it comes to our physical form, I believe a sturdy foundation is built upon a solid core/hip connection, strong posterior chain, and mobility + stability gains from various joints.

I like combining the mental and physical forms of resilience.

Training the body with rigor and intention dramatically increases your mental toughness levels.

It takes a certain level of mental fortitude/tenacity to build your physical resilience, as it doesn't just happen by accident.

It’s hard. Very tough to show up day after day, stay focused during the boring grind, and be able to hold optimism. You already know this.

I find strength and belief in knowing that other humans have similar struggles.

One human, in particular, inspires me to challenge myself relentlessly.

His name is Goggins — David Goggins.

Former Navy Seal, Ultra Marathon Runner, Smokejumper, and overall badass.

In his book, Can’t Hurt Me — he introduced me to the concept of the Cookie Jar.

The Cookie Jar metaphor is something David imagines when he is going through difficulty and struggle.

When he is about the give up — he remembers the Cookie Jar.

He “reaches” into the cookie jar and grabs a cookie that reminds him of his traumatic childhood.

David Goggins had an extremely difficult and abusive childhood — he shares the deep emotional wounds throughout the book.

He then uses certain instances from his past to remind him of how RESILIENT he is.

He survived multiple beatings from his father — endured countless racist situations, and made it through Navy SEAL Hell Week (3 separate times!)

So whenever he is on mile 131 of a 150-mile race and everything is hurting — he reaches into the cookie jar and finds his cookie of choice.

This habit of reflecting on the times he overcame the odds in his past serves as a motivating boost for the present challenge. A boost he can access at any time, any place, under any circumstance.

Under tremendous stress and fatigue during Navy SEAL training, he reminds himself of the torturous childhood he experienced — that gives him the strength and awareness that he is one tough S-O-B!

Adversity builds Adaptability.

I am building my resiliency day by day — cultivating a strong sense of emotional, mental, and physical tenacity is something I have always wanted to achieve.

Well, not always.

I thought I had enough resilience. I thought I was set up for life.

Until I found I wasn't. Damn — that was a tough loss.

I’ve been through tough moments, and I have crumbled to the pressure multiple times.

When things got tough — I often quit and played my violin of sadness.

Woe is Me was my soundtrack.

Now — in the face of adversity, I choose adaptability.

I choose to resemble the tree, the strong mom, and the rescue dog.

It is a never-ending quest.

Building a Reservoir of Resiliency will require continuous effort and dedication for a lifetime.

Either we fall victim to adversity and struggle or we continue cultivating the qualities that will lead us to a meaningful life.

As we go through difficulties, failures, successes, losses, wins, and everything in between:

We will adapt and learn valuable lessons.

We will deposit our Resiliency Rack$$$!!!

We will help others gain awareness of their strength and help them fill their Reservoirs.

And when life is kicking our asses, we will withdraw from our Reservoir of Resiliency.

That’s just what we do.

Relentlessly Refilling of the Reservoir of Resiliency.

Beep, Beep, Beep!

Back up the Brinks Truck — we got some deposits to drop off!

Thank you for your time,

Paril

Embrace the Chase